Staring back at the reflection of her perfectly curved hour glass figure in the mirror of a store, she thought ‘If only I was pretty.’ Looking at that woman, a passerby lady with bulging love handles and a cheerful baby in her arms thought, ‘If only I had that hot body.’ While she thought that, another woman staring at her happy kid looking lovingly at his mother thought, ‘If only I were happy.’
This scenario is quite a commonly experienced one. Many of us have a habit of not speaking nicely to ourselves. This can lead to a distorted perceptions of ourselves. We may think of ourselves as a fat, ugly, worthless, unhappy and that we do not deserve to live a good life which makes us despise our body and existence, but in reality, we are all unique.
We strive to want to be normal, which does not exist, as we are all different. Rather than trying to embrace this, we strive to be like everyone else, which does not exist. We feed ourselves negative suggestions and seek evidence of this from the external world. Supplying your mind with negative mental food only sabotages your self-esteem. Naturally, when you keep telling yourself how you lack in a certain area or how your life isn’t as nice as someone else’s, you will feel miserable about yourself. This depletes you of your self-confidence which consequently makes it harder for you to manifest the life you truly want to live.
Normal is a perception we create ourselves. It does not really exist. The thing is the way we see others is a reflection of our own world. If we can see the good in others and not in ourselves then we will always see others better than us.
A major reason why we fail to accept ourselves and see us as normal beings is because of the societal norms. The many media biases and the standard set by the society make us nurture distorted beliefs in our lives. Only those with the most petite and slender figure are deemed gorgeous and those driving the most luxurious car are deemed successful and happy. Look beyond what is shown to us.
If you keep following these norms, you will only make yourself become more miserable with time. Don’t you want to feel genuinely happy and peaceful from within? Don’t you want to love yourself wholeheartedly? Don’t you want to feel comfortable in your own skin? Of course, you do and that’s your right too. In that case, it is time you change the distorted self-perception you have created and develop a sense of self where you truly love ourselves, value who you are and what you are capable of. I absolutely love helping people through the process of self-discovery and to really connect with who they are.
Our distorted self-image is because of how we see ourselves from things that have happened to us. We may think we are fat and ugly or worthless and despise parts of ourselves, but the truth is that how we speak to ourselves gives permission to others to treat us this way. We need to realise the beauty of who we are and not live in illusion where we think we are something because our environment has taught us this. It is now time to change this perception and develop a sense of self where we truly love ourselves and value who we are and what we are capable of.
Love and accept yourself for you, as a divine being of light. No judgement or comparison with others, simply self love and appreciation. Shine your unique light on the world!
The first step to do that is to make a list of all your supposed imperfections and tell yourself out loud that you embrace your imperfection because it makes you who you are and that you love yourself completely. This gets easier the more times you do it. Say, ‘I love myself with all my imperfections because they make me a unique individual.’ Shower more love and kindness on to yourself and train yourself to speak nicely to yourself. Yes, this is a process which will take time, just like it takes time to learn to drive and yes you may stall when you have passed your test, but you learn from this. When your attention goes to how you do not have a car, think of how you can afford to buy food for yourself. Shift your focus from what’s lacking to your blessings and you’ll build the attitude of gratitude which will help you see everything as normal, good and happy helping you settle easily in your life.
Remember, your opinion of yourself and your life matters most so build a positive one. Need more help with that? Connect with me so I can help you love yourself and your life more.